C.S Lewis wrote in The Screwtape Letters where a senior devil writes to a junior devil on the art of temptation: “ My Dear Wormwood, Yes. A period of sexual temptation is an excellent time for working in a subordinate attack on the patient’s peevishness. It may even be the main attack, as long as he thinks it the subordinate one. But here, as in everything else, the way must be prepared for your moral assault by darkening his intellect”
Being addicted to pornography is nothing new. It is a potent weapon in the hand of the devil. He simply dangles his bait and the flesh does the rest. Pornography appeals to the carnal nature. Experts in the field of sexual addictions contend on-line sexual activity is “a hidden public health hazard exploding, in part because very few are recognizing it as such or taking it seriously.”
A Promise Keepers survey reported 53 percent of its members used pornography. A 2000 Christianity Today survey asked pastors about the level of pornography in their congregations. 57 percent believed pornography was the most damaging issue for their congregation. A Barna Research Group study (Feb 2007) said 37 percent of men and 17 percent of women reported having used pornography in the past month. Porn websites attract 72 million visitors every month.
The UK has pornography revenue of $1.97 Billion (2006). A poll conducted by the RAW STORY website indicated a surprising number of Christians are addicted to pornography, “The poll results indicate that 50% of all Christian men and 20% of all Christian women are addicted to pornography,” said Clay Jones, founder and President of Second Glance Ministries.
Other data clearly show how big a problem being addicted to pornography is for Christians on the Internet. A Focus on the Family Poll, October 1 2003 reported:
· 42% of Internet users view porn.
· 34% Received unwanted exposure to sexual material.
· 47% Christians who said pornography is a major problem in the home. (Focus on the Family Poll, October 1, 2003).
Addicted to Pornography?
The Anatomy of Pornography
“The devil often sits back and lets the flesh do his dirty deeds. Unrestrained human sexuality can turn the beauty of intimacy into something ugly through pornography” Bob Larson: Larson’s Book of Spiritual Warfare Published: Thomas Nelson 1999.
For most Christians pornography is associated with shame, guilt, pain and the destruction of relationships, but why is it so addictive? According to Care.org UK “Pornography stimulates the pleasure centre in the brain. But after a while more pornography is needed to produce the same effect. The addictive cycle is started. There is an increase in intensity in the addiction so that the individual needs more or harder material to get the same affect, moving on to the accepting of degrading behaviour (desensitisation) and the ultimate acting out of images seen in pornography.”
CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS, CHANGE YOUR LIFE
It’s the book that’s changed the life of millions. “I have personally read As a Man Thinketh over 25 times.” – Mark Victor Hansen, co-author, the Chicken Soup books. Download a FREE eBook of James Allen’s “As A Man Thinketh.”
Is being addicted to pornography really harmful?
John 8:32 “Then you will know the truth , and the truth will set you free.”
Care.org UK defines pornography as: “the ‘explicit representation of sexual activity in literature, films, etc, to stimulate erotic rather than aesthetic or emotional feelings. Pornography according to Care.org UK is for “titillation and fantasy”.
Soft porn could be mistaken as harmless but it is still harmful and sinful:
“Soft core’ and ‘hard core’ pornography have no legal or dictionary definitions. They are two ends of a continuing line, which starts at bare breasts and genitals and ranges towards violence, bestiality and child pornography. In recent times what used to be thought of as ‘hard core’ is appearing in ‘soft core’ top shelf magazines and is readily available on the Internet. The boundaries are blurred.” (Care UK)
Scriptures are full of calls to righteousness. One such scripture is “Abstain from all appearance of evil.” (1Thess 5:21) which counsels Christians to maintain the distinction between morality and immorality “
Addicted to pornography- What about your Marriage?
The American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers in 2003 believed Internet pornography was a significant factor in 2 out of 3 divorces. (American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers in 2003 – divorcewizards.com). J. Lindsey Short, Jr., president of the American Academy of Matrimonial Lawyers, stated, “While I don’t think you can say the Internet is causing more divorces, it does make it easier to engage in the sorts of behaviors that traditionally lead to divorce.” (The Impact of Internet Pornography on Marriage and the Family: A Review of the Research August 2005, Washington, D.C. JILL C. MANNING)
Another survey found 49% believe pornography promotes negative attitudes towards women and encourages viewers to think unprotected sex is O.K. ( Kaiser Family Foundation 2001 poll)
Focus on the Family’s Pastoral Ministries reported that approximately 20 percent of the calls into their Pastoral Care Line are for help with issues such as being addicted to pornography and compulsive sexual behaviour. Evidently, people who are addicted to pornography is causing harm in the lives of many Christians.
My personal and intense rejection of pornography is rooted in the undeniable truth that women are reduced to and portrayed as mere physical objects for selfish lustful gain and this in my opinion attacks the image of God in every woman. Pornography also warps a God given gift showing the sexual act independent of a long-term loving mutual relationship.
Jill Manning believes the foundation of our society is under threat because of pornography, “The marital relationship is a logical point of impact to examine because it is the foundational family unit and a sexual union easily destabilized by sexual influences outside the marital contract. Moreover, research indicates the majority of Internet users are married and the majority seeking help for problematic sexual behaviour online are married, heterosexual males.”
Her findings found that the research indicates pornography consumption and pornography addiction is associated with the six trends; ·
1. Increased marital distress and risk of separation and divorce
2. Decreased marital intimacy and sexual satisfaction,
3. Infidelity
4. Increased appetite for more graphic types of pornography and sexual activity associated with abusive, illegal or unsafe practices,
5. Devaluation of monogamy marriage and child rearing
6. An increasing number of people struggling with compulsive and addictive sexual behaviour.
Does addiction to pornography affect women?
The Bible tells us Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled…Hebrews 13:4. These six trends defile the purity of the sexual union between a husband and a wife and undermine the foundations upon which a successful marriage and family is established. Jill Manning rightly states “Internet pornography is altering the social and sexual landscape”
Unless we stop him the devil will continue to press through his diabolical vision for humanity trapping Christians in the process. Being addicted to pornography is not God’s best.
The scriptures commands “Drink from your own well, my son—be faithful and true to your wife. Let your manhood be a blessing; rejoice in the wife of your youth. Let her charms and tender embrace satisfy you. Let her love alone fill you with delight.” (Proverbs 5:15, 18 – 19). This word does not allow room for external sexual gratification outside marriage.
Care UK places an emphases on an easily forgotten truth that “Pornography… promises the unreal promoting false expectations of relationships and ignoring the realities of daily living…” (Care UK).
Christians need to be mindful that they are called to live in the world but not be a part of its sinful activities.
Pornography and violence.
The link between being addicted to pornography and violence is self-evident but recent research confirms what we, as Christians instinctively know.
Dr. Mary Anne Layden, director of education, University of Pennsylvania Health System commented, “I have been treating sexual violence victims and perpetrators for 13 years. I have not treated a single case of sexual violence that did not involve pornography.” Source: Gow, Haven Bradford. “Child Sex Abuse: America’s Dirty Little Secret.” MS Voices for Children. 3/2000
Jill Manning’s research into pornography and its affect on individuals concluded there is “a modest correlation between exposure to pornography and subsequent behavioral aggression.”
She also cited the following findings: Pictorial nudity reduces subsequent aggressive behavior (9 studies) while material depicting nonviolent sexual activity slightly increases aggressive behavior (24 studies). She found 7 studies proving that a strong correlation exists between depictions of violent sexual activity and aggression. Clearly, internet porn is a dangerous evil intrusion.
Our sinful desires are not gender specific. The Psalmist said in ”Indeed, I was born guilty. I was a sinner when my mother conceived me”. GOD’S WORD® Translation (©1995) Pornography affects everyone and women are not immune to the harmful affects of pornography.
The data on women using pornography is concerning with 28% admitting to being addicted to pornography according to the internet-filter-review.com website.
Is there a link between being addicted to pornography and female sexual dysfunction?
According to recent research findings there may be a relationship. DivorceWizards.com reported 43% of American women who were addicted to pornography suffer from sexual dysfunction.
The testimony of Jill C. Manning, concluded, “the impact of sexually explicit material on behavior is more complex than is often assumed in pornography research, but that a negative impact exists” “Research reveals many systemic effects of Internet pornography that are undermining an already vulnerable culture of marriage and family.” Even more disturbing is the fact that the first Internet generations have not reached full-maturity, so the upper-limits of this impact have yet to be realized. Furthermore, the numerous negative effects research point to are extremely difficult, if not impossible, for individual citizens or families to combat on their own” (Jill Manning)
Help! I’m addicted to pornography
A few hours on the Internet will uncover numerous websites established to help Christians addicted to pornography.
Sexaholics anonymous website (http://www.sa.org/) adapts the Alcoholic Anonymous 12 step plan to overcome sex addiction and provides what I believe is a pragmatic and workable plan, giving a real sense of hope rooted in God’s grace.
The Twelve Steps of Sexaholics Anonymous
1. We admitted that we were powerless over lust — that our lives had become unmanageable.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.
6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.
7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.
8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.
9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.
10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps, we tried to carry this message to sexaholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.
For full citation see: Sexaholics Anonymous Inc SA adaptation © 1982, 1984, 1989, 2001 SA Literature. Reprinted with permission of SA Literature. © 1997-2003 Sexaholics Anonymous Inc
If you are a wife concerned about your husbands sexual addiction Marcia Means on her website http://www.awomanshealingjourney.com provides one-to one support and insightful resources.
A very good site is http://xxxchurch.com/ Media web based resources are easy to navigate and candid in their approach People tell their stories on video and how they were set free. The website addresses the issue of shame, which keeps people in bondage and brings the problem into the light of Jesus Christ.
Addicted to pornography-Sexual Addiction Resources:
Addicted to pornography support for pastors
http://www.safefamilies.org/pastors.php
Need help from someone who knows what addicted to pornography means?
http://www.sa.org/
Need addicted to pornography self-evaluation and assessment tools?
For specific and general help:
http://www.focusonthefamily.com/
http://www.firesofdarkness.com/we_recommend.htm
Are you a parent, needing help to protect your children from the dangers of pornography?
http://www.throughtheflame.org
CHANGE YOUR THOUGHTS, CHANGE YOUR LIFE
It’s the book that’s changed the life of millions. “I have personally read As a Man Thinketh over 25 times.” – Mark Victor Hansen, co-author, the Chicken Soup books. Download a FREE eBook of James Allen’s “As A Man Thinketh.”
